Adventures in DIY Personal Products

Some fun facts I've learned off of Facebook memes recently:

Parabens are chemicals that serve as preservatives in antiperspirants, cosmetics, & sun lotions.  99% of breast cancer tissue contained this everyday chemical.  Scientific research has shown that most breast cancers develop in the upper-outer quadrant of the breast.  And it just so happens that area is closest to the lymph nodes exposed to antiperspirants.

26 seconds is all it takes for the chemicals in your personal care products to enter your bloodstream.

These facts look much more dramatic in their original meme form, but as I'm not into copyright infringement, I won't post them here.  But suffice to say that the Internet in general, and Facebook in particular, is full of factoids like this, depending on where you look.

The more I learn, the more I really want to venture into making my own personal care products, as I vowed to do sometime back around the beginning of the year.  (Of course, I also vowed to start blogging more, and we can all see how well that has turned out so far...)

Why yes, that bottle of baby wash does, in fact, have a mustache.

I actually have made a few things though!  I made Little Bug some baby wash using a recipe from Heather Dessinger's DIY Organic Beauty Recipes.  I love how it smells (so clean, with just a hint of sweet orange), and it literally leaves his skin squeaky clean.  I only wash his hair about once per week anyway, unless it gets food or something gross in it, and I use the wash on his skin once every two or three days, depending on whether or not he needs it (most of the time a good soak gets any accumulated dirt off just fine).  The only real adjustment we've had to make to our bath routine is that I have to be extra careful when I rinse it out of his hair, as it's not "tear free" as the Aveeno baby wash we used to use.

I've made myself face wash and toner, also from DIY Organic Beauty Recipes.  Both make my face feel clean and balanced and wonderful.  Next on the list is her recipe for tooth powder, which I will make once my current tube of Tom's of Maine runs out.  And then deodorant; I am planning to try a recipe posted by the lovely and talented Mrs. H.

Some time ago, I actually made up a batch of homemade laundry detergent, and I haven't looked back since.  I use it for everything and it seems to work wonderfully.

Soap, soap, soap, soap...

And this desire to make my own is slowly spilling over into all kinds of other areas too.  A few weeks ago I started a bottle of vanilla extract.  And after seeing a few other memes up on Facebook and reading this article, I now have a glass on my windowsill with green onion root tips in it, which I'm hoping will grow into new plants.  I have some other plans floating around in my head; I'll just have to see where this takes me!

Obligatory cute picture of Little Bug.

Lovely spam, wonderful spam!

(In case you don't get the reference, the title of this post comes from a Monty Python song.)

Email spam, that is.  I will be happy if Little Bug never ever learns that the word "spam" applies to anything else in the world.  'Cause even before I was vegetarian, I thought spam was nasty.

Anyway.

Sometimes, when I go to empty out the spam folder in my various email accounts, I actually open the messages.  You know, just for funsies.  And I can't help but wonder why con artists or scammers or whoever it is sending this crap out even bothers.  I mean, does anyone actually fall for this crap?

Like this one:

This is to inform you that your E-mail Address has WON you the sum of 1,000,000.00GPB (One Million Pound Sterling) from the Chevrolet Award Promo 2013.The Draw No:1593.make a contact and collect your winning fund immediately, Fill the Information below:

---

Chevrolet Award Promo <302@ms2.kntech.com.tw>
Reply-To: chevrolet_clams2013@hotmail.com
1. Full Name: 2. Full Address: 3. Valid Phone Mobile Number: Contact Email: chevrolet_clams2013@hotmail.com Mr. Gore William Chevrolet Company Department, E-mail: chevrolet_clams2013@hotmail.com

Because yes, I'm going to believe I somehow won "one million pound sterling" from a contest I never entered.  A contest for which the contact email is a hotmail account.  Come on, you can do better than that.  No one uses hotmail these days.

Or this one:

Delivery Update

---

Courier Company <per.lindahl@ias-intl.org>
Reply-To: sdcservice@yahoo.cn
Pending Delivery Alert! This is a reminder that Your packet is already on the transit point (Rome). It has been on hold awaiting pickup since December 28th,2012. You are expected to call or email us with a confirmation of the exact recipient address. Recipient Postal Details required are stated below; FULL NAME: ADDRESS : TELEPHONE NUMBER : From our database,it shows your package is coming in with a high priority delivery (highly classified package),so you should attend to this case promptly. You have to Confirm if you wish to come to ROME for pickup of your package or if you want us to deliver to you in your location. For more info, call us on: +39 328 879 6421, Note this is a highly valuable delivery and so, you must attend to all messages promptly. Looking forward to a prompt response from you. Sergio Marchionne. (Delivery Agent)

Because, obviously, I am such an up-and-comer in the world that I regularly receive mysterious courier packages delivered to me in foreign countries I have never even visited before.  Calling this foreign telephone number sounds like a fabulous idea!  What could go wrong?

Some of the other things in my junk mail folder just confuse me.  Like this one:

This Stock Is Trading UP

---

Arabella Brooks <olafart@b-g-s.com>
To: holly.scudero@gmail.com
The next Winner!!! Breakout on the horizon! Trading Date: Mar, 4 Name: Gold & GemStone Mining, Inc Sym: G G_S_M Last Trade: $.017 Long Term Target: 0.30 It is heating up before the close, could be explosive!!! The Alarm is still sounding!

I've received four separate emails within the last few days containing basically this same information.  I don't trade stock.  If I did, I wouldn't act on mysterious tips that come from bizarre email addresses.  And why did they capitalize the words "winner" and "alarm?"  Don't these people know that I am not a fan of capitalizing random words for no reason?  And that comma after "close" should really be a semicolon.  Even if I were inclined to buy your stock, the lack of proper English language usage would cause me to turn away.

And what about this one?

Hello Dear

---

Faridah Mohamad <faridmamod@suomi24.fi>
-- Hi Dear My name is Miss Faridah I saw your profile today on the Internet friendship site and decided to write to you to know if we can become friends. I hope to hear from you soon so that I can send you more details about myself including my photo. you can write me here (faridmamod@yahoo.com) Yours Sincerely Faridah --

All I can really say here is WTF?  (No, seriously, imagine me saying this as the acronym, not as the words it stands for.  Trying to clean up my language here; I do have a 13-month-old, after all.)  Well, Miss Faridah, I don't think I'm comfortable with you calling me "dear."  And I'm sure as hell heck not going to be sending you a picture of me.  Internet friendship site?  What does that even mean?  No.  No, we cannot become friends.  The end.

Starters

This is a thing that I know: most of my best writing is done in my head, usually late at night, when I am in no position to grant the words any kind of permanence.

Many a middle-of-the-night nursing session has been spent lost in thought, composing blog posts in my head.  But since getting out of bed after Little Bug is done in order to record those thoughts on the computer (or even plain old-fashioned paper) is completely out of the question, those posts remain in my head.  And let me tell you, I can write sentences that sound amazing in my head sometimes, but if I don't write them down right away, they're lost forever.  Oh, sure, I can try to re-create these wonderful compositions later on, but they never come out nearly as intelligent-sounding or funny or thoughtful or whatever the next day.  So I give up, delete the document, and go on with my life.

Except sometimes those ideas continue to float around in my brain.  The only way to banish them completely is to write them down, but since I can no longer do justice to those ideas... well, the idea for this post was born.

For your entertainment, I present a sprinkling of ideas, a smattering of topics and stories I have wanted to work into blog posts in the past, but that never made it out of my head and into written form.

There was that time when I wanted to write a series of open-ended letters, mostly to people who piss me off.  Dear guys who wear sunglasses with white plastic frames: I am going to assume now that you are probably a douche-bag.

Dear owner of this car: 

Just so you know, vehicular modifications are not an effective 

method of compensating for deficiencies in other areas of your life.

Or that time when a good friend and I possibly kinda freaked out the other mamas at a baby playdate by using the topic of postpartum depression as a segueway into a discussion about placenta encapsulation.  Although I think the (less diplomatic) phrase used was "And then I ate my placenta."
(I think this may have happened on more than one occasion, actually.)

There was the time I started a list of all of the Facebook status updates that I never used because they probably would have offended someone.

Or the time I started a list of all of the types of posts on Facebook that I don't read.  (Example: If I have to click on a picture to read a long story, then no.)

Or the diatribe of why, when it comes to giving birth, I would probably be a nightmare hospital patient.  A nightmare for the hospital, that is.  Nope, barring valid medical reasons, any future babies I have will probably be birthed at home just like Little Bug.

Or there was the time I was talking with another mama at an indoor play place, and she commented that her toddler had an iPad, but followed that comment with a self-deprecating request not to judge her, and I said I don't judge anyone, since parenting is hard work.  Except I did, I totally judged her in my head.  Call me Judgy McJudgerson.

Maybe an account of trying to take a "sick day" with a toddler in the house.  No extra sleep to be found there.  Or ever.

One Year Old: A Slightly Belated Update

Somehow, an entire year slipped away from me and now my Little Bug is a year old!

Walking tall!

Or, he is a year and almost two weeks.  So much for that resolution to blog more often.

Little Bug started walking a month or so ago, and now hardly needs my help at all, although he likes holding my hand when he's tired or sometimes when we're in an unfamiliar environment.  And he needs me to go up and down stairs, sometimes.  I had to go buy him some real shoes recently, since I'd probably be considered a bad parent if I let him walk around outside barefoot or just in his socks.  Not to mention the fact that his socks would all get filthy.  (But at least he'll wear socks now.  We went through a phase where he loved pulling his socks off.  Heck, he loved pulling everyone's socks off.  My socks, the socks of other babies...)

His newest skill is clapping his hands, and he spent the entire day today walking around clapping and grinning.  And of course, I was grinning all day too, because what mama doesn't delight in her child's enthusiasm for the world?  I also taught him to high-five a few days ago, a skill he proudly showed off for his daddy at the video teleconference earlier this week.

Clap your hands!

Sometime in his eighth month, Little Bug really took a good interest in food.  We didn't really do much with purees, mostly because he didn't like them but also because the "traditional" method of introducing solids just didn't sit right with me.  I pretty much always have and still do just feed him directly from whatever I'm eating myself (with exceptions sometimes; if I'm eating junk, I make him something healthy).  To start off, I'd mash it up a little with a fork or cut it into tiny pieces, but nowadays he's pretty good at mashing things with his gums (and chewing with his seven teeth) so I can offer bigger chunks that allow him to figure out eating for himself. Yep, spices and salt and all, and none of this one-new-food-at-a-time-with-several-days-between nonsense for us.  Little Bug so far loves pretty much everything, although his distinct favorites are bananas, raisins, green beans, carrots, brussels sprouts, beans, and egg yolks (hard boiled).  He also loves bread, and cheese, and I started offering peanut butter on occasion shortly before he turned one (my one concession to neurotic food schedules), and he loves that too (just like his daddy).

Banana attack!

I have no idea how much he weighs right now, or how tall he is, because I was too lazy to schedule his first birthday well baby checkup on time and I couldn't get an appointment until March.  Suffice to say he's a big boy, and carrying him around should eventually give me some nicely toned arms.

He does still love being worn in the Ergo, although it won't be long before I won't be able to carry him that way in the front; already he's getting too tall that he barely fits under my chin!  He loves being worn on my back too though, and my sister is going to gift me with a backpack-style carrier that will make hiking easier.

Little Bug has a plethora of toys.  He loves balls and his stacking cups and anything with wheels, and he loves bringing me books to read.  (He doesn't always stay put for the entire book, but whatever.)  He loves the little wheeled cart his grandpa (my dad) got him for the holidays, and he loves his set of IKEA little pots and pans.

And he's finally, finally getting past the stage of "everything in the mouth."  That's not to say that Little Bug doesn't still put things in his mouth, because he does, but he doesn't put everything there anymore.  We can go walking outside and I can let him pick up leaves and twigs and know that he might just look at them and then put them down, although he does still try to eat them sometimes too.

So all in all, our son is growing up.  He makes me smile, and sometimes my heart swells so much with love that I don't know how I could possibly love him any more (but there are always more reasons to love him), and every day brings new things.  How could I have ever thought my life was complete before I had my Little Bug?  All that's missing now is my beloved D, and hopefully we only have a few months left before he comes home to us.

Wish you were here!

There are so many things that I wish D could see right now. So many little things, so many precious moments that make my heart swell with joy. (Not trying to make you feel bad, honey, I swear!) Raising a baby is one of the most joyful endeavors I've ever embarked upon, and there are no end to the things that make me smile.

I love this picture, even if Little Bug's eyes
are closed.

Sometimes I think I should be taking more videos of Little Bug during these long months of deployment. And then I remember that I don't have a video camera, and my regular camera doesn't seem to take videos, and even if I did have a good reliable way of taking videos, it wouldn't really work anyway. I can't even easily take pictures anymore; most of them have a little hand reaching intently toward the lens. And more than half of them are blurry anyway. I swear, Little Bug never stops moving. He's a very busy boy.

So since I don't have videos, I'll instead try to paint a picture with words.

~*~*~*~
Little toothy grins. As of now, Little Bug has two teeth on the bottom and three on the top, and I think a fourth might be on its way in up there. (Hard to get a good look though...) He has the cutest little smile, with all of his little teeth, and I love the way they flash when he laughs.
~*~*~*~
I still haven't succeeded in teaching Little Bug the sign for "milk," which I use interchangeably with "nurse." I'm hoping that eventually he will start signing when he wants a snack, rather than coming over and pulling my shirt down, since that's not exactly okay to do out in public. Within the last few days, though, he's started telling me he wants to nurse by grabbing the nursing pillow and doing his best to fling it at me. (He's not strong enough to actually throw it, but that doesn't stop him from trying!) I love how he knows what the pillow's for!

Buddies! ...kinda...

~*~*~*~
He has, however, approximated a sign for "bath." Every night, Little Bug has a bath at 1800, and woe be to me if I'm not ready on the dot. I've been trying to teach him the sign for "bath" for awhile now, and he seems to have modified the one I'm using into something of his own creation!
~*~*~*~
Blowing raspberries. Little Bug loves blowing raspberries at me, and he loves it when I blow them right back. Sometimes we wander around the store while shopping, Little Bug strapped to my chest in the Ergo, blowing raspberries back and forth.
~*~*~*~
First steps. He's getting better every day! He can walk all over the place so long as he's got something to hold on to, and can easily make it across the room on his own. I think he'd make it farther if he didn't get so excited about his abilities though; he just wants to go, go, go, as fast as possible, and then he ends up going too fast and falls over. Chubby legs, unsteady steps... heartwarming and amazing.

Dino pajamas!

~*~*~*~
Bananas are one of Little Bug's favorite foods. Bananas, blueberries, and sweet potatoes. And when we share a banana, I usually let him take his own bites. Which is a comical sight to behold, as he won't bite down until he's stuffed as much banana in as will fit. A Tremendous Mouthful of banana, as it were. And then he looks at me and mashes it with his gums and some dribbles down his chin. Sometimes he ends up spitting some out, if it's more than he can swallow on his own, but more often than not he gets it all down and then comes back, grinning, for more.

Ten Things for 2013

Pretty sure I'm not the only one who feels weird typing "2013."  It's hard to believe that it's a new year already; didn't the last one just start?

Anyway, stealing an idea from the wondrous Mrs. H here; last year, she posted a list of twelve specific things she wanted to accomplish in 2012.  I'm not quite that ambitious, so I'm only going with ten things for this year.

Little Bug's first time at the top of Cowles Mountain in San Diego.

So, without further ado:

Ten New Things for 2013

1.  Blog more.  I know, I know, I've been terribly neglectful of my little blog here.  But that's about to change!  Well, maybe.  Clearly, the Internet needs more of my opinions.  So I'm going to try to post something once a week, but you probably shouldn't get your hopes up too high.

2.  Exercise more.  I used to be a total fitness nerd, but for the past eleven months I've been using Little Bug for a convenient excuse not to.  Don't get me wrong here; running around after a baby means I rarely stop moving, and we go for a walk of some sort pretty much every day, but I've decided it's time to get in better shape again.  That picture above of us at the top of San Diego's tallest "mountain?"  I was pathetically winded the entire hike.  Time to change that.  (And I won't lie; I want to look good for my honey when he gets home from deployment!)  So, inspired by a recent post by Mama Birth, here are my rules:  at least 20 minutes per day, six days per week, Sundays are free.  If all I do is walk, it must be at least 30 minutes.  And walks totally don't count if they involve Starbucks.  Ideally, I will be doing more strenuous things than walking (hiking, weight training), but so long as I'm active, then I'm happy.

3.  Create "In Case of Emergency" binder.  Stealing this idea from my friend Noël, shared on one of her many lovely blogs.  It's hard to go against the conventional wisdom of DON'T EVER WRITE DOWN YOUR PASSWORDS EVER OR THEY'LL GET STOLEN AND THEN YOU'LL BE SORRY, but it's harder to argue with her logic of keeping control of your own information.  So this year, hopefully sooner rather than later, I'm going to create an "In Case of Emergency" binder and then buy a bigger fireproof safe to store it in (since my current safe is entirely too small to store anything useful in).  Go read her post if you want more details on this wonderful idea.

4.  Make some of my own "beauty" products.  Any by that, I really mean just things like body wash and face wash.  I recently picked up (figuratively speaking) a copy of the new ebook DIY Organic Beauty Recipes, written by Heather Dessinger of The Mommypotamus.  I've perused it a little, and I'm especially interested in making some new baby wash for Little Bug and dabbling in things like tooth powder.

5.  Start Little Bug's baby scrapbook.  That's right, he's coming up on his first birthday and I haven't started any kind of baby book for him yet.  (This may qualify me as a "bad" mommy by some standards.)  My intention has been to create a scrapbook for him covering at least the first ten years of his life, full of mostly pictures because I'm not sentimental enough to add things like locks of hair.  Time to go on Shutterfly and create some scrapbook pages and get this party started.

Little Bug is always trying new things.

6.  Knit a few pairs of baby socks.  I haven't completed a single knitting project since Little Bug was born.  Honestly, while I miss knitting sometimes, it's kind of at the bottom of my priority list of things to do during nap time.  So I'm thinking that I'll try to get back into the swing of things with small projects.  Thus, my aspiration to knit some baby socks.  Little projects = sense of accomplishment.  Plus, I LOVE HIS FEET!  The only way they could possibly be cuter would be if they were clad in homemade socks.

7.  Make jelly.  Late last summer, a good friend and I dabbled in learning how to can stuff; we made jams and pumpkin butter and had all kinds of fun, and I have a small stockpile of interesting things in my cupboard that I refuse to open until D returns home from deployment.  My primary resource is the book Food in Jars by Marisa McClellan.  Next on my list of recipes to try: jelly.  There are a couple of jelly recipes that start with juice of some sort, which is always accessible.

8.  Renovate my personal file system.  Inspired by Mrs. H's goal to organize her finances, I've decided my paper filing system needs an overhaul.  I frequently pull documents to shred (I keep everything for thirteen months, except tax-related documents which are retained for five years), but so much has changed in the last few years that my folders are kind of in shambles.  I have folders for things I no longer have, extra folders crammed into places where they don't really belong, and a need to create new folders for some things life has recently thrown our way.  I will purge documents and folders, relabel things, and reorganize until I'm happy with my "important papers" box again.

9.  Participate in Vegan MoFo.  Once upon a time, I dreamed of starting a blog purely so that I could participate in the Vegan Month of Food.  Well, I have a blog, so this year I will finally do it.  What is Vegan MoFo?  As the website says, "The idea is to write as much as you can all month, about vegan food."  Goodness knows I'm not actually completely vegan (and I probably never will be), but I do eat vegan a lot.  So this October, it's on!

10.  Participate in NaNoWriMo.  I've tried to get myself to write during National Novel Writing Month twice in the past two years, but never lasted longer than a few days.  If you've never heard of NaNoWriMo before, the idea is to write an entire novel during the thirty days of November, at least 50,000 words in length.  I shall try again this year, and hopefully I shall be victorious!

Unrelated musings

He's coming for you.

I.  Crybaby

There are currently five things that I know of that consistently make Little Bug cry:

• My cough.  This one is most potent at night; if he's asleep, no matter how deeply, my cough almost always wakes him up crying.  During the day, he only cries when I cough if he's in need of a nap.
• The vacuum cleaner.  Well, if I'm wearing Little Bug, he'll usually fall asleep by the time I'm done with the apartment.  If I'm not wearing him, the vacuum makes him cry.
• A certain friend's laugh.  It took us awhile to pinpoint this, but my friend and I eventually figured out that something about her laugh seems to startle him, and he cries.  When this happens, I work hard not to laugh at him.
• Packing tape.  When I'm using clear plastic packing tape for any reason, the sound of it usually makes Little Bug cry.
• A certain friend (of Little Bug's) cries.  For some reason, when this one friend of his cries, Little Bug's empathy kicks in and he starts crying too.  But only for this one friend.  Other babies cry, and he totally doesn't care.

II.  Unmentionables

Sometimes, I get tempted to start another blog.  But an anonymous blog, one that no one would know was written by me.  Then I could write about pretty much anything.

You see, there are a few topics that I would very much like to blog about, but for whatever reason I just can't.  Like the family member/friend/random acquaintance/etc. who makes me frustrated/pissed off/etc. and I want to talk about here, but I'm afraid they'll see it and think I don't like them or are talking behind their back when really all I want to do is VENT because I can't actually change things and it doesn't mean I don't otherwise like the person in question I'm just VENTING.  Or various topics related to babies or parenting that I have strong views on but my strong views don't necessarily agree with the societal norm and I don't want to talk about it here because my family/in-laws/friends don't even know I do/don't and I simply am not prepared to open that can of worms yet with them even though for some reason I'd otherwise be okay with discussing my views with strangers I don't know.

Yeah.  That sort of thing.  Maybe some day I'll become brave enough to blog about some of those things openly.  Maybe someday, but not today.

III.  Telemarketers

Today, I received a call from some sort of telemarketer who asked for "the person who owns this number."  I was silent for a moment, and then asked if she had a name.  She said no, just the number.  I asked what she wanted (without providing my name), and she started off into a speech, providing me a company name (financial something or other) and saying they had collected numbers "from my area," at which point I interrupted and asked where she thought I lived.  (Because my area code totally doesn't match my current location... one of the joys of being a Navy wife, I suppose.)  She couldn't tell me, which means she probably didn't know.  I interrupted again and said I was not interested in whatever she was selling.  She said she wasn't "selling" anything, and requested that I listen to what she had to say before saying I wasn't interested.  I interrupted again and asked to be put on their "do not call" list.  I listened long enough to hear her say she would, and then I hung up.

Ugh.  Telemarketers get worse all the time, and that's two minutes lost forever, wasted on a BS call with someone who didn't even have my name, just my phone number.  How irritating.

A month of gratitude

I don't do "Black Friday."  Never have.  Hopefully never will.  I don't think any "deal" is good enough to face the madness at the stores.  Plus, my idealistic side is not into supporting the big stores, although my practical side freely admits that I will end up buying some of my holiday presents at them.

For what it's worth, my morning tea latte did *not* come
from Starbucks today.  Although I do drink a lot of Starbucks.

Yesterday, I was fortunate enough to get to celebrate Thanksgiving in the company of two good friends and their families.  I contributed a lentil shepherd's pie and a pumpkin pie; other dishes included sweet potatoes, potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, green bean casserole, and an amazing pecan pie.  I have a bunch of leftovers, which Little Bug and I will continue feasting on for at least a few days.  Good food, great conversation, and fun times; D may be away, and I may be unwilling to travel during the holidays, but thanks to a good support network I still had a fabulous holiday.

Little Bug enjoys his first Thanksgiving feast!
It's difficult to get a picture these days that isn't a little bit blurry...

Over the course of November so far, I've been watching as my friends post daily about what they're thankful for.  In that spirit, here is a list of thirty things I am thankful for.

1.  My wonderful husband, D.  As that song goes, "Lucky I'm in love with my best friend..."

2.  My Little Bug, my little sunshine baby.  I am so blessed to have such an amazing son who is helping me to rediscover the wonders of life.

3.  While we're working on those essentials, I'm thankful for the rest of my family, those I'm related to by blood or marriage.  It's nice to have so many people to care about, and who care about us.

4.  Friends, both near and far.  Friends that I've collected over the course of my life thus far and in all of the places I've lived.

5.  I'm thankful D has a secure job that enables me stay home to care for Little Bug.  I'm also thankful D & I are both on the same page financially, and that money is very rarely an issue of contention between us.

6.  I may not have to work, but I'm thankful for being a book reviewer and for my various freelance editing gigs.  The little bit of extra money certainly doesn't hurt!

7.  Of course, I'm very grateful for my little fuzzy monster, Freddy.

Freddy watches Little Bug suspiciously.
Maybe one day they'll be friends...

8.  My ability to cook.  Being able to make healthy, delicious food for my family is a joyful thing.

9.  Certain convenience foods.  I try to cook fresh whenever possible, but on busy days (like Thanksgiving!), it's nice to be able to substitute gravy mix for my usual homemade mushroom gravy and still be satisfied with my meal.

10.  Certain appliances.  I love my slow cooker, and yesterday my immersion blender made pumpkin pie filling into a breezy process.

11.  Books.  I may not get to read as much as I used to before having a baby, but I still love to read.  I am also thankful for my library, and the fact that it only takes me ten minutes to walk there.

12.  Music.  I love to sing, and I sing to my Little Bug every day!

13.  Pie.  Because, honestly, who doesn't love pie?

A crappy cell phone picture of my pumpkin pie.  And then I ate it.

14.  Tea.  My tea drinking habits have definitely changed over the last year; I can't remember the last time I finished a cup of tea at home without having to re-heat it at least once, and at least half the time I'm drinking lactation tea, but that's okay.  I still love my morning tea!

15.  CSAs.  I may not currently be a member of a CSA (because with D gone, I simply cannot eat the contents of an entire box by myself), but I am incredibly thankful that community-supported agriculture programs exist.  Gives me hope for the future of our food system.

16.  Two Sentinels Camp, my other home, even though it's been a few years since I've been able to volunteer there.  This place, and the other people who run it, played a major role in shaping the person I am today.  Someday, I will be back, I promise.  "Two Sentinels will be my home; makes no difference how far away I roam..."

17.  The Internet.  Enough said.

18.  My health.  I'm glad I am relatively fit and healthy, that I have the physical strength and endurance necessary to keep up with my growing boy.

19.  I'm thankful that I had such a positive birth experience, in a time and place where so many women cannot truthfully say the same.

20.  I'm also thankful I've had the courage to follow my instincts when it comes to parenting.  Raising a child is the hardest thing I've ever undertaken, but also the most rewarding!

21.  Text messages.  Seriously.  Ease of communication is a wonderful thing.

22.  Skype and video teleconferencing on base.  I may be separated from D physically at the moment, but at least I get to see his face in real time every now and then!

23.  The forthcoming arrival of the last book of The Wheel of Time, A Memory of Light.  Closure is coming, my friends!

24.  Board games.  And card games.  And dice games.  And role-playing games.  Yes, I'm that kind of nerd.

25.  Freedom of speech.  I listen to the news every day, and I'm always finding new reasons to value the fact that we have the fundamental right to say pretty much anything.

26.  NPR.  Balanced news coverage is a wonderful thing, and I learn new things all the time from all of the other wonderful programming here.

27.  Home.  I've always had a roof over my head, and I've never lived anywhere where I ever felt unsafe.  Well, our first apartment in Sacramento could be debatable.

28.  Our planet.  Sometimes I start thinking about the miracles of science and nature that have all conspired to create this world we inhabit, and then my head starts to hurt.

29.  Chocolate.  Enough said.  Oh wait, I'm also thankful that I started liking chocolate again once Little Bug was born.  Otherwise, that could have been one of life's little tragedies.

30.  My beloved country.  I am unbelievably blessed to have been born in this nation.  Sure, America has its faults, but I wouldn't want to live anywhere in the world but here.

Applesauce BBQ Sauce

When I said I was going to find or create recipes to use my surplus of jarred baby food, Little Bug laughed at me.

Well, try this on for size: BBQ sauce made with applesauce.

Seriously.  Give it a try.  Tangy and sweet.  Mmmmm.

I made Crispy Barbequed Tofu Slices with my sauce!

Applesauce BBQ Sauce

inspired by this recipe on allrecipes.com

1 c applesauce (2 [4-oz.] jars apples/applesauce baby food)
1/2 c ketchup
1/2 c brown sugar
1/4 c lemon juice
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp onion powder

Combine all ingredients in a pot over medium heat.  Bring to a boil.  Cover (or use a splatter screen; you don't want to get hit with this!) and let boil a few minutes, stirring regularly.  Remove from heat and let cool completely (it will thicken).  Makes 1 1/2 - 2 cups.

Ingredients!

...yum?

This is how Little Bug helps when I cook.

I totally suck at taking pictures of food.  But here's the finished product!

Introducing the Post-Deployment Bucket List!

Quickie post here.

Eight months is a long time to be separated from my honey.  And seeing as my primary method of coping is to keep busy (but not too busy; don't want to burn myself out), there are a lot of things Little Bug and I are doing for the first time that we'd like to experience again as a complete family.

I know I won't be able to remember everything on my own, so I'm starting a list!  Here on my blog, where I can add to it as Little Bug and I hit the town and find new things to share.  I'm calling it the "Post-Deployment Bucket List," and I'll keep updating it over the duration of D's deployment.  Go check it out, if you feel so inclined!  There is now a link at the top of the page.

Little Bug at the San Diego Botanic Garden, where we recently visited
with some friends.  So many new things to see!

What to do with jarred baby food?

Until recently, I had never bought commercial baby food for Little Bug.  In all honesty, he doesn't really even like finely pureed foods.  I think it's a texture issue; he has a hard time swallowing purees.  In order to get him to eat the organic applesauce that his grandma lovingly made just for him, I usually ended up mixing it in with some of my breakfast oatmeal.  (And then he loved it!)

Actually, thus far the solid food adventure could primarily be classified as baby-led weaning.  The main idea here, which seems so obvious and intuitive to me, is that babies don't really need purees.  Once babies are ready for solids, they can handle actual adult people food.  They can manipulate it within their mouths to make it swallowable, and will gag and spit it out if they try to swallow too much at once; in this way, they quickly learn their limits and how to, well, eat.  (Note too that gagging and choking are not the same thing.)  And better yet, they are quite capable of feeding it to themselves, thank you very much.

This is another area where I found it a little difficult to go against the grain.  At first, anyway.  After spending my entire lifetime watching babies receive their first foods from those cute little jars, it felt a bit weird to be taking a different route.  (The one exception to this was my sister, who made baby food from scratch... she helped to normalize the idea that baby food doesn't have to be bland or tasteless or contain only a single ingredient.  But she still started with purees.)

So we eased in slowly.  I honestly couldn't tell you what Little Bug's first food was; I don't remember.  But we started with soft things that I knew he could easily mash up with his gums.  Banana.  Avocado.  Cooked carrots or peas that I smooshed just a little between my fingers before offering to him.  Steamed zucchini, lentils, beans.  And always in small enough pieces that he could swallow without choking on, just in case he didn't manage to thoroughly gum them first.

And now?  When we split a banana every morning--and by split, I mean he eats maybe a third of it--he takes a tremendous mouthful, stuffing as much in there as will fit.  He used to end up spitting out half when he did this, but now he just works it around and slowly swallows until it's all gone, and then eagerly comes back for more.  (Sometimes he gets worried that I will eat it all before he gets seconds!)  I will offer a piece of veggie to him on the palm of my hand, and he will carefully pick it up and cram it into his mouth.  When we go to the farmers' market, I offer him whole berries to nom.  Out at breakfast the other day with my dad and his lady friend, we gave him little bits of plain pancake to feast on.  Fortunately, the nice people at IHOP didn't mind that he made a giant mess; honestly, who could get annoyed with that cute little face?

So that's where we are now.  The only purees he eats are things that are naturally pureed: applesauce, mashed potatoes, pumpkin puree from the pumpkin I roasted the other day.  And none of which are finely pureed; lumps make life more exciting.  He'll consent to being fed with a spoon occasionally, but he really prefers to feed himself, and he doesn't really like food that contains no lumps.

And then I signed up for WIC.  In case you are unaware, WIC is a government program that provides pregnant women and the parents of young children (up to age five) with vouchers for healthy foods.  The primary qualification has to do with income, and a surprising amount of military families can qualify.  Among other useful things, we get vouchers that pay for about sixty jars of baby food per month.  Per month.  I wish I could instead get more money to spend on fresh produce and whole grains, since that's what he actually eats.  But I'm not one to turn down essentially free food, so now I have a ton of jarred baby food in my cupboard.

I tried feeding him one jar.  He thought it was okay, but seemed much more excited when we switched to something more, erm, substantial.  So instead, I'm going to try to think of more creative things to do with all of those tiny jars of pureed fruits and veggies.  Add to pasta sauces or soups?  Maybe.  I bet I could toss part of a banana in my Magic Bullet along with the contents of a fruit jar and some almond milk (or, more likely, soymilk, since I get a ton of that from WIC too) and make a smoothie.  Applesauce is applesauce, which I can mix into my oatmeal (and then share with Little Bug) or use to replace the oil in recipes for baked goods.  Bananas can replace eggs, or just be made into banana bread.  "Winter squash" could surely be turned into pumpkin bread, or maybe... pumpkin pie?  Pumpkin risotto?  (Of course, I have a bunch of pumpkin puree in my freezer, but bear with me here.)  I have a vegan brownie recipe somewhere that calls for prune puree.  (Seriously.)

We'll see.  If I come up with anything exceptionally creative, I'll be sure to write about it here.  Until then, I guess I'd best devote a shelf of my cupboard to my increasing supply of baby food!

Baby Noms

Om nom broccoli

Inspired by a recent post at the blog In Short, Stories, as well as a suggestion by the talented Mrs. H, I decided to keep an ongoing list of everything that Little Bug has licked, bit, slobbered on, or otherwise nommed today.  Just for funsies.

And it's quite a list.  Little Bug spends most of his waking hours putting various things in his mouth, like most babies his age I suppose.  And if he can't put it in his mouth, he puts his mouth on it!

Quesadilla triangles for grabby little hands

Here's as complete of a list as I could manage.  For the record, many of these things were taken away as soon as I realized he had gotten hold of them.

my pillow
cell phone
nightstand
computer mouse
(clean) cloth diaper prefold
banana
daddy doll
the straps of my Ergo baby carrier
ballpoint pen
my teething necklace
Swiss chard, cooked with onions, garlic, and an egg
cheese quesadilla
box of markers
WaveWinds magazine
various parts of me, including: fingers, toes, ear, shoulder, his milk source, leg, etc.
(closed) tube of baby sunscreen
the couch
various toys
cloth napkin
various books, including: But Not the Hippopotamus, A Little Sip of Chicken Soup for the Soul,
     Outside Over There, Global Babies, & Halloween ABC
his own fingers & toes
today's junk mail
dinnertime vegetable medley: carrots, broccoli, green beans, summer squash
my water cup
his water cup
car keys
washing machine
bath tub
wash cloth

Going against the norm

I've noticed it's not uncommon for parents to try to do things differently, "better," the second (or third) time around.

"My first baby was induced a week before her due date, I got an epidural because I couldn't handle labor, and we almost had to get a c-section.  This time, I hired a midwife so I can give birth at home."

"We used disposable diapers last time; no one ever told me cloth was so much cheaper and easier!"

"We used a cry-it-out approach with our first, but I've read so much since then...  This time, we'll be using a gentler approach."

I think it's easier to try something new, something less "mainstream," when your first experience was a bad one.  You have time and conviction on your side.  What I don't hear many people talk about is how hard it is to buck tradition with your first.  When you don't have bad memories, complications, regrets, or even vague doubts on your side, it can be hard to deal with others who don't understand why you're not just doing things the "normal" way.

We chose to have our son at home, and I firmly believe that the only reason we didn't get more grief ahead of time was because we didn't really tell anyone.  Afterwards, most of the responses we got were positive.  Some people called me a rock star for having a baby without drugs at home, omg, while others congratulated me on sticking to my convictions.  Interestingly, most of the negative responses I got were from medical professionals; the pediatrician I took Little Bug to for his three-day checkup seemed unable to comprehend why I would voluntarily give birth at home, while the one I saw a week later took less issue with the birth itself than with the fact that I didn't transfer to a hospital afterwards.  When I went to the emergency room to get my Rhogam shot (this was the easiest way, since I had stopped seeing an OB months ago), the triage nurse looked at me like I was crazy and asked, "But it wasn't planned that way, right?"  My stock response became I had a very fast labor, providing an explanation without any further information, neither confirming or denying my reasons or lack thereof.  Amazing how quickly I learned to give vague answers and let people draw their own conclusions.

Even before the birth, my "alternative" ideals came up against opposition.  I knew long before I got pregnant in the first place that I wanted to go natural; no epidural for me.  It didn't take long for me to stop vocalizing that idea to others.  "Oh, everybody says that the first time around," well-meaning but condescending women would tell me.  "Trust me, you'll want the epidural."  I knew what I wanted, and I truly believed I could give birth with out medication.  But against that kind of all-knowing negativity, with no experience on my side, what am I supposed to say?  End result was that I softened my stance a little, even while knowing the truth on the inside.  I was at least going to try, I said, and even that was met with a nasty little smile.  "Just you wait," they said.  I was strong enough to ignore those comments, and smart enough to stop openly verbalizing my ideas without first feeling out my audience.

But in retrospect, there's something very sad about being uncomfortable talking about things without first knowing that my thoughts would be well-received.

It's so easy to have doubts, even if in your heart you believe you're doing the right thing.  I did not have a single ultrasound during my pregnancy.  Not one.  They are so commonplace nowadays that many women get one at every appointment.  My insurance didn't cover them unless they were "medically necessary," and the OB I was seeing early on volunteered to "make up" a reason if I wanted one!  So many people don't realize that, in many cases, an ultrasound isn't necessary.  They are a relatively recent technology, and women have been growing babies for most of human history without them.  One of my books told me that for the baby in the womb, undergoing an ultrasound is similar to being in a subway tunnel; the decibel level of what the baby hears is that high.  I also read that there really haven't been any long-term studies on the fetal effects of ultrasound.  (Don't ask me where I read these tidbits.  I read a lot of books and web articles and blogs during my pregnancy.)  I knew that I didn't want an ultrasound, although I would have willingly undergone one had my midwife thought it necessary.  (Interestingly enough, at one point she did.  My fundal height didn't seem to match the estimated due date, and she was thinking we might have it wrong.  My appointment was for the day after I ended up going into labor.)  And yet, even with all I knew, all I had read, I still doubted myself, deeply and frequently.  What if there was something wrong?  What if my baby was malformed?  What if there was some disorder that could be detected through an ultrasound?  Some days, I felt like I was trying to reassure myself that I had made the right decision.  When everyone is asking how the ultrasounds looked, asking me to post pictures on my Facebook page or posting their own, when I didn't know a single person who didn't get an ultrasound themselves during their pregnancy, it was easy to doubt myself.  

Of course, everything turned out fine.  Ten fingers and ten toes, no problems whatsoever, a picture of health.  But that doesn't mean I didn't doubt myself.

When it comes to dealing with these subjects that I worry will garner negative responses from others, I find there are three main ways I talk about them.  The first is to not talk about them at all.  I didn't talk about my decision to have a home birth with many.  I (wisely) didn't mention to any of Little Bug's pediatricians that we were co-sleeping.  Sometimes not talking is a good decision (it's not worth the lecture from the doctors), but sometimes I feel like my reticence is contributing to the problem.

Sometimes I give vague answers, like my stock response about having a fast labor, and let others think what they will.  When the pediatrician asked if he got the vitamin K drops at birth, my response was that the baby got "everything he needed" at birth from my midwife.  (Again, not worth the lecture.)  

And sometimes, more frequently than I'd like, I try to blow things off.  So many people seem to think that babies need to be fit conveniently around their own schedule that heaven forbid we inconvenience ourselves for them.  Cloth diapers?  So much cheaper than disposables, and when they're nursing they're so very easy to wash!  Babywearing?  Much more convenient than lugging around a stroller!  Baby-led weaning?  I've no time for pureeing foods, and letting him feed himself is much easier than bothering with a spoon.  Co-sleeping?  I get more sleep when he's right next to me; it's so much easier to get him back to sleep after he nurses when I don't have to put him back in a crib!  I have a friend who practices elimination communication (which we dabble in), and the only time I've seen her publicly mention it on Facebook was with the caveat that it saved on diapers.

Why do we do this?  Because we don't want to get lectured by the "professionals."  Because parenting issues are already so polarizing and we don't want to be drawn into arguments.  Because our family might not approve.  Because we have doubts about our own decisions.  Because it's not what "everyone else" does.  Lots of reasons, I guess.  

I, for one, would love to be able to have more honest, open conversations about the choices I've made and the things I do for my baby.  And yet, there are so many topics I am simply uncomfortable discussing, even if I know I'm making the right choices for me and mine.  I can only hope that as I get more parenting experience under my belt, I will become more confident in my decisions and more willing to discuss these things with others.  Otherwise, how will some of these things become more acceptable in the mainstream?

Week in Review: Sept. 23-29, 2012

San Diego continues to be gross and hot, weather-wise, although it's getting cooler at night; I actually had to pull a second blanket up the last few nights to keep me warm!  Now if only Little Bug would consent to keeping a blanket tucked around him too, then perhaps he wouldn't wake up as often.  Ah well.  Fall will come for real one of these days.  I'll just keep telling myself that.

At Cabrillo National Monument

What I'm Reading

Should parents be disappointed when they want a girl and get a boy?

The Globe and Mail

"Many mothers and fathers hardly realize that they have gender hopes – until the sex of their child is revealed and they learn that they were harbouring expectations all along. While not an official diagnosis, “gender disappointment,” a private feeling of shock and dejection, washes over some parents when they envision life with a boy or a girl, only to birth a child of the opposite sex."

Hey, Stay Home Moms (and Dads) - What Have You Been Doing All Day?

mothering.com

"Considered dinner choices. Decided to use up the leftover roast in a potpie rather than open the just-bought ingredients. Elbow deep in piecrust prep, I realized the baby was too quiet. Looked around the corner to find her eating a stick of butter. Washed my hands, scooped her up and got smeared by butter and her leaking diaper."

12 Reasons Why the AAP is Right and You Should Circumcise Your Infant Son

Jennifer Margulis: Sticking My Neck Out

"8. You plan to dye his hair black and buy him green contact lenses to match Daddy’s so you want his penis to match Daddy’s too."

The Booger

Conscience Parenting

"But as soon as I swoop in he freaks out like I am about to murder a kitten. If I am in public, people look at me. And then I’m all…
I don’t need to get it. It is just a booger."

What I've Been Eating

Barley and Pepper Chili (The Everything Vegan Cookbook by Jolinda Hackett)
Good Whisk Bread (Wildly Affordable Organic by Linda Watson)
Cantaloupe Jam (Food in Jars by Marisa McClellan)
Fragrant Eggplant (vegweb.com)
Shortbread Cookies (Betty Crocker Cookbook)

Dealing with the First Deployment

We're coming up on a month now since D left on his first deployment; we were told it would be an eight-month deployment, but there's always the chance that it might get extended.  (I hope not!)  Little Bug and I are adapting well enough, although for whatever reason his daddy's departure messed his sleep "schedule" up.  Has *not* wanted to go to bed for the past few weeks, but that's slowly getting better.

Anyway.  Thought I'd pontificate on some of the methods we're using to deal with the separation.

Phone calls.  These don't happen very often, and are completely unpredictable when they do.  Still, hearing D's voice always brightens my day, and when I put him on speakerphone, Little Bug's face inevitably lights up in a big ol' smile.

Email.  These help me more than they help Bug, but they are invaluable to me; they are my primary form of communication with my husband while he's on deployment.  I email almost every day, although he's so busy that he doesn't always get to respond in kind; I also know there will be periods when I may go days or maybe even weeks without hearing from him.  That's going to suck.

Care packages.  How else is a good wife to show her love for her man except by sending him goodies, specifically food?  And anything else he specifically requests too, of course!  I know D doesn't have much space for personal belongings on the ship, so it's actually best (in my opinion) to send mostly consumables.  The postal service's flat rate boxes are definitely the best way to go.  These are always free at the nearest post office; you only pay for shipping, and sending the largest to a military address is less than $15.  It's worth noting that if you call USPS to order supplies, you can request a special kit for military families, which comes with boxes and tape and labels and such and is completely FREE, delivered to your door.  You have to call in for this kit though; the number is 1-800-610-8734.  It's also worth noting that when you send packages to deployed service members, you have to fill out a customs form.  They're a bit of a pain, but between the person I talked to at the post office and this website with a picture tutorial, I managed okay.

Videos.  Before D left, he recorded a bunch of pictures of himself reading poems for me to show Little Bug. The original idea was for them to be a bedtime thing, but Bug isn't always interested in sitting still and watching a video when he's tired, so I often just show them whenever I have my computer on and he's willing to sit (relatively) still for a few minutes.  He loves these!  There's also a program called United Through Reading which allows sailors to record videos of themselves reading stories while on deployment, which then get mailed back to the families at home as a DVD.  I learned about this through my FRG and promptly told D, who is (hopefully) trying to find out how he can get involved!

Photo book.  I ordered a photo book from Shutterfly that is filled with pictures of Little Bug and D together. We look through it almost every day, although some days Bug's hands are just too grabby and I don't want him to rip the pages.  There is a program through the USO that allows you to send free photo books (from a different company) to any military address too; perfect to send a little something to someone stationed abroad or on a ship somewhere!

Daddy Doll.  I also ordered a Daddy Doll for Little Bug to cuddle, since he can't cuddle with his daddy for real.  It's basically a good quality stuffed doll featuring a full-length photo of his daddy.  There are a wide variety of options as far as size and customization go, and you can even get a voice recorder to put in it.  Little Bug loves his!

If you think about it, we're already almost 1/8 of the way through this deployment and managing just fine.  Yes, it sucks, but we'll be okay.  D and I have been together for nearly eight years; we're strong enough to last for an eight-month separation.

Week in Review: Sept 16-22, 2012

Perhaps the reason why I don't post on here very often is because I spend what little "free" time I do have reading.  I do read a lot of review books for San Francisco Book Review, and I read the reviews of others as I copy edit them.  I read the stories of others as I edit them for freelance projects.

And I read articles online.  Lots of articles online.

In my defense, reading stuff on the computer is one of the ways I get my sanity back after Little Bug is asleep at night, as I lie in bed next to him, as he sometimes remains attached to me because he fell asleep while nursing.

And, of course, there are some nights when I don't read at all, because it took hours for the little guy to fall asleep.  (Had one of those last weekend.  I blame a combination of teething and still adjusting to his daddy's deployment.)

When I'm not reading, I'm probably cooking.  Or trying to, anyway.  I don't want to start living on processed foods while D is gone, but it is pretty difficult to cook with a seven-and-a-half-month-old who would much rather play with (and on) mommy than with his toys.

Anyway.  In an effort to actually post things more often, here are some of the things I've been up to this week.

What I'm Reading

It Takes a Village 

mothering.com

"Some days are harder than others. Some days all I have accomplished is my children being fed and watered and diapers are changed. And, some days, that is a feat in itself. Those days are hard, because you feel like you are the only one who is struggling…you are the only one who sometimes feels that you signed up for way too much and you just aren’t cut out for this job. You wonder if you will ever get a peaceful shower again, or a full nights sleep, and you find yourself daydreaming about the days before these little beauties were in your life. You kick yourself for ever taking for granted sleeping in until 8, or being able to sit down for dinner, or watch whatever the hell you want to on TV."

Eight Months Old: Sleepless in Columbus 

Birthing Beautiful Ideas

"You nurse a lot and you eat some solid foods (Baby Mum Mums and avocado and pumpkin are you favorites) and you don’t seem sick and your teeth might be coming in and you are certainly going through some growth and development spurts and you seem generally happy but I’m so worn out. Sometimes you seem worn out too."

Vaccine Exemptions Under Attack 

mothering.com

"The US has a century old tradition of accepting conscientious objection to medical procedures and all medical associations support, in principle, the doctrine of informed consent. Informed consent specifically states that one must not be coerced into making a decision and that one may decline a treatment or procedure. Further, the right to decline a treatment is not contingent on the effectiveness of that treatment. Does our tradition of informed consent not apply to vaccines?"

As plans to cut down on epidurals cause a furore, JENNI MURRAY says... Get real, girls! Pain is part of childbirth 

Daily Mail

"We’ve learned to feel shame about our bodies and about sex — and nothing requires a woman to open up the part of her that is meant to be so private like delivering a baby. We’ve learned to hand responsibility for our health to doctors, rather than trust our instincts."

Harvard Study Confirms Lower IQ in Children Exposed to Flouride 

the Healthy Home Economist

"The strong evidence that fluoride negatively impacts children’s neurological development and actually lowers their IQ just keeps growing and growing."

What I'm Eating

Skillet Green Bean Casserole (from happyherbivore.com)
Tofu Ratatouille (from 125 Best Vegetarian Slow Cooker Recipes)
Savory Black-Eyed Peas (from The Baker Creek Vegan Cookbook)